non sense

The previous post was one of those posts that don't really make sense to you people at all. It's useless to post stuff that other people can't understand right? But it's because I can't understand it either and it's hard to put in words, because words are limited. But it's lame to post in code only I can understand. So now I'll post stuff that don't seem so abstract. Or maybe not.

There's something about me that's changing. I notice that at some periods of the day I just lapse into a quiet state of emoness or sianzation (haha justin) that is not good. Maybe I'm just tired but this never happened to me so often. And also sometimes I feel like I couldn't care less of what happens around me. Maybe it's JC life or something but I don't know what it is. Even Di Wei noticed and asked me why I so sad after choir practice on wednesday but I was not sad, I was just something. It's that feeling that comes when the party's over and you're clearing up.

And also it's not easy to leave. They're not called friends for nothing. Time and again I find myself dwelling on the fact that I'm leaving. And there is a bit of pain and you try to hide it and say move along but no you're going the VJ and everyone's going everywhere else too. It's not short enough that you don't bother, and it's not long enough that you can be sure you'll be able to see them again in life like with you secondary school friends for two years. And Randy's not making it any better by asking me why I go VJ like everyday. (No lah just joking lah Randy haha).

I keep on telling others not to be sad and it's okay and try to give hope to everyone but end up feeling down sometimes. Is like oxidising agents get reduced. Okay lame haha HAPPY LAH!